Where is R.W.A

Hello friends, family, esteemed colleagues, cohorts, jilted lovers and psychologists looking to read up on the latest in circadian rhythms. Today we will be answering the hard hitting question of "Where is R.W.A", the timing of which couldn't be better as it will allow me to segue in to my recent absence and provide an abundance of content.

First off I want to recognize that the blog has reached the next level of blogcellence obtaining it's first follower (You know who else had followers? Jesus. If Judas would identify himself ahead of time I'd appreciate it). Every journey begins with one step and it looks like this Spaceship Challenger of blogs is all rockets go. With the recent fall of News of the World there is a serious dearth of content with journalistic merit and I hope to fill that void (fear not, I only hack e-mail accounts, not cell phones).

Anyway the question of "Where is R.W.A?" can be answered on multiple levels (by multiple levels I mean two). In The Mars Volta sense of reality it exists in the interwebs, in the mind of its readers, in the people who inspire the blog and content (unlike Mars Volta it lacks espanol and something called "Cerpin Taxt"). This an unsatisfactory answer though and based on pitchfork reviews of Mars Volta albums would likely receive a score of 2.4 - 5.8 from Ryan Schreiber et al.

In actual reality it consists in the "hive mind" of the writers who subside in the MEGATROPOLIS  (I thought I created that word to over-emphasize the importance of the city but apparently some shitty German power metal band called Iron Savior already utilized the term to over-emphasize the importance of what otherwise would have been a flaccid album -  Judge for yourself.) of Calgary, Canada. The city is located on the Western side of Canada in the rolling plains. Since people tend have a better understanding of things when you relate it to America, it is basically a copy of Denver except colder (-), richer (+), smaller (-) and lacks both Tim Tebow and John Elway (+++).

While Calgary has the population and economy (read, superfluous dollar bills) to support a decent music scene, until recently it has been largely lacking. The main problem with the city is its geographical location; while a band could come here and make some decent coin, where do you go from here? Medicine Hat? Moose Jaw? Billings? Fargo? Unless you start/end your tour in the city and want to waste a tour day to come from/go to Vancouver you'll probably skip it on your itinerary (except Josh Homme, cause he is badass and doesn't give a shit about making money). In the past it has lead the city to get a lot of popular (read: crap) bands who will get a big enough payout to make it worthwhile and some smaller bands still trying to make a name for themselves. There has been a lack of the bands you (and by you I mean me, who's ultimate judgement of music is superior to 99.7% of the population) really want to see.

Anyways, there are a couple times of a year when we get some better acts coming to Calgary. The first is around the time Sasquatch Festival is occurring as it gives relevant bands a reason to be in the area. The second (and pertinent to this diatribe) time of year when we get decent music in the city (and before someone writes in to tell me how Sled Island attracts great content (which it does) keep in mind the format (SXSW style) and price ($200 for a festival wristband) can be somewhat prohibitive (having a wristband doesn't necessarily guarantee you access to a show - they can fill up) so go ahead and pre-emptively ride your fixed gear bike off of a buffalo jump) is Stampede Week.

WTF is a Stampede Week you ask? Wikipedia describes it as an "annual rodeo, exhibition and festival". While those are its roots, in reality it is Cowboy Halloween. Instead of lasting one spooky night it lasts for approximately 11 days straight where people from ages 16 - 42 dress up like slutty cowboys/cowgirls and get drunk as much as possible (example: everyday). Aside from the benefit of being able to obtain consensual sex from strangers on a consistent basis and duck out of work at 9:30 in the morning with your bosses permission to drink shooters in a giant tent, it also brings relevant bands to the city to "cash in". Just like how teens on ecstasy like to dance, drunk people like to listen to music and it provides the perfect avenue for bands to come to town.

How is this relevant to this blog? It's not really, it just gives you a background as to my absence (it's a circle) at the end of the week (read: my booze wearied body was incapable of writing. I'm no Hemmingway). While the dream of blog 365 is now dead (it was inevitable, only Cal Ripken likes working everyday) you know a little bit more about the world. Also if you come to visit please mention this blog as I get a 5% off coupon at Peter's Drive-In for promo-ing the city.

PEACE